Moving Forward

In 2018 I plan on “Embracing My Midlife.” Today is a new day, a new month and a new year. And with that comes new opportunities, new adventures, a collection of new dreams and new skills to achieve.

Since January, I’ve been preparing for an even better year. I’ve gotten into rescheduling blocks of time into a fresh, new, clean calendar. I’ve been planning ahead, noting important dates and making those a priority.

I continue to be open to new opportunities, however different they are from my normalcy. I never know who I’ll meet, what skills I’ll pick up or how the Lord will use me. I was reminded yesterday of all that I go through in my journey of life. It is my story to teach lessons through my writings, actions and reactions.

What are you doing to organize and move forward in 2018?

Cleaning out is part of the battle. Realizing that in order to make room for the new, I must remove some of the old. Yesterday I dropped off donations of things I no longer use that maybe useful to others. I’ve been going through paperwork and email accounts removing the old.

And I am moving forward by setting up new files and a budget for 2018. Setting it up is one thing, but keeping it all in production is another. I’m taking the time to feel the comfort of organization. And I’m reminded of opportunities that will arise because things aren’t in a clutter.

But what got me to this point? I had a delayed holiday party with some girlfriends in January. I did a heavy-duty cleaning of my house. Afterwards, I packed my Christmas items. In the midst. I picked out items I no longer needed. This organizing state continued into the rest of my life.

Work-wise, I’m redesigning my website and this blog after three years. I started at the end of 2018. And due to life getting in the way, I’ve realized I need to carve out time to finish it. So keep your eyes open as “My Midlife” will be changing to “Embracing My Midlife.”

And health-wise, I continue to strive for a better lifestyle. I’m still taking part in the MeltDown Challenge^® at www.meltdownchallenge.com. And our weigh-out for this completion is a matter of days. I’ve lost 12.8 lbs. since January 2.

Again with the calendar – carving out blocks of time is key. Getting back into gym classes and trying news ones helps keep me on my toes. And food planning is important too – planning to eat at home more often.

And what about my spirit? I find donating my time and being with believers encourage me in positive ways. Another good use of the calendar and planning. Remembering I don’t have to accomplish everything at once but in baby steps helps the psyche as well.

So what are you doing to move forward for a positive 2018? I’d love to hear your ideas and we can learn together.

Blessings to you in your journey.

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Thirteen Years Ago

Life has a tendency to throw curve balls. But it is the way in which you play the rest of the game that matters.

Thirteen years ago I enjoyed an afternoon wedding in a castle. It was my wedding. I remembered having my marriage license signed for the adventure that was to begin.

Today I didn’t celebrate that event. But I remember it and know that I would not have grown into the woman I am today without having had gone down that road.

I’d love to hear from you on your thoughts about this post.
Blessings to you in your journey.

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Tasting Other Aspects of Life

Ever consider going to a restaurant and eating raw? Just think of it as tasting other aspects of life.

After my heart attack, my body requires a low-sodium and a heart-healthy diet. Yet there comes a time when you need a break from the norm.

With that in mind and a ladies’ night due, I chose a local Triangle restaurant that I need to recommend. Living Kitchen is located in the heart of Raleigh, North Carolina on Fayetteville Street. It’s in walking distance to the Raleigh Convention Center, the Duke Energy Center for the Performing Arts, Meymandi Concert Hall and Red Hat Amphitheater.

Been to any new, healthy or out of the norm restaurants? Any healthy choices to help in “My Midlife?”

I felt as if I walked into Ikea – the bamboo colored tabletops, simple chairs and stools décor whispered a very clean and “green” atmosphere. It was very much a “raw,” “organic,” and healthy restaurant to try something “out of the box” for an evening.

The waitress was pleasant, welcoming and guiding us on our tour for the evening. Explaining my health concerns, she showed me what to avoid and what would be safe.

I chose a healthy tropical drink to start – the Avocolada. They blended avocado, pineapple, coconut, vanilla and apple juice for a smoothie.

And for my appetizer, I ordered to share – the Portobello Falafel. According to the menu, these were “three Mediterranean style falafels, served with cashew yogurt tzatziki and tabouli.” According to Wikipedia, Falafel is usually made primarily of chickpeas and deep-fried.

Remember, I told you we were at a raw restaurant. But as our waitress explained, this is one of the menu items not totally raw, yet it’s not traditionally deep-fried either. It is actually toasted. And also unlike the chickpeas, their version is mainly portabello mushrooms. The end result – a tasty treat. The cashew yogurt tzatziki sauce and tabouli tasted very much like the traditional side items.

My main course was a unique choice full of flavors, introduced in a new way. I’ve been on an avocado kick lately, so I was eager to try the Avocado and Basil Sandwich. This treat from the garden consisted of a “toasted multi-grain bread piled high with fresh slices of avocado, tomato, red onion, sprouts, basil, a lemon-parsley hummus and cashew sour cream.”  My side item was a Broccoli Waldorf salad made of “broccoli, green apple, celery, walnuts, raisins, and red onions tossed with cashew mayonnaise.”

I do have to say, I didn’t realize that cashews can be used so many ways. And though they have fats, according to our waitress, they are one of the healthier fats.

Our overall reaction – extremely tasty and filling. It was so much so, that we boxed our left overs and skipped dessert. As with being downtown, we still had to walk to our car – another healthy move for the night.

So if you ever want anything out of the norm and crave something raw. Just think of it as tasting other aspects of life and see where your taste buds take you while visiting the Living Kitchen.

I’d love to hear from you on your thoughts about this restaurant and if you think it will be somewhere you may visit. Blessings to you in your journey.

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Where Do I Find that Special Someone

With Valentine’s Day approaching where do midlifers meet “The one?” In our younger days, dating was easier. I would see a guy across the classroom and eventually he would notice me. But times are tougher in “My Midlife.” So where do I meet that special someone?

Church, people say church. Been there and done that. It does help to attend a church strong in a single fellowship. But I’ve also visited other churches, primarily singles events. Funny thing, when you’re in one denomination, you meet the same people all across the board. They’re in the same boat. You’ve seen them so much it feels more like a family reunion at church functions then a place to meet like-minded future husbands or wives.

Do you have any great ways, links, areas or other sources to meet “the one?”

Speaking of meeting people in like-minded arenas, there’s always Meetup groups. They are nation-wide and call for people to fit any particular niche. There’s a group that meets for dance, walking, yoga, sports, photography, book clubs and well, you get the picture. Meetup offers an array of areas where you can come into contact, and potentially meet someone of interest. If not, you’ve spent an afternoon playing a sport you like or learning how to dance with several partners.

And another high tech way to reach out and meet others, why not try online dating. Yep, I’m there now. I’ve tried Match.com and eHarmony. I’ve heard stories of matches that have resulted in marriage. Other sites are less expensive or free such as Okcupid, whereas others go by a subscription. Coupons and discounts are online or emailed often. In addition, some of these sites also offer opportunities such as cooking classes, wine tastings and even trips such as skiing or cruises to meet other singles in a more comfortable environment.

Talking about classes, why not go old school. Check out night classes at local companies and community colleges that may peak your interest.

But more and more, I hear people meet available partners through friends and family in “My Midlife.” So whichever way you choose, I’m going to keep my eyes open because you never know where I may find that special someone.

I’d love to hear from you on encouraging words of dating in “My Midlife.” Blessings to you in your journey.

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Bunco is “My Midlife” Game of Choice!

Hear the roar of the crowd? Smell the food? Got your teammate? Who’s routing for who?

You think you’re at the Super Bowl? Nope! Bunco is “My Midlife” game of choice!

Invited online, Mom and I decided to adventure out with a new group of ladies. The lady who invited me, we met at the Triangle Associational Freelancer’s meeting just last Thursday. So when the invite came across Facebook – Mom said, “Sure, we can do that!”

Both of us have played in the past. But like anything, “If you don’t use it, you lose it!” And in actuality, I only played once. And like any regional game or dance, some rules vary from one destination to another. But it’s easy to catch on, as there were a couple of newbies last night.

I’d love to hear your Bunco stories. Please post your comments here as I’m still growing my audience and want to start conversations at “My Midlife” blog. Blessings to you in your journey.

Like the Super Bowl, we had chips and dips, appetizers and refreshments. We had teammates, though they change from table to table, and sometimes you keep the same. But no jerseys are required. And we toss, not a football, but a little pink die across the room with a “travel.” And missing players, no problem – we women improvise with a ghost player until someone comes into replace her (there’s more than one reason for a stuffed animal in this world!)

Like the Super Bowl, it’s a room (or arena) full of people (or ladies) wanting a night out. It was a room full of about 10 ladies from all different states who migrated to North Carolina. They varied in age, most of them moms, who just wanted a night to be girls (ladies) again. No sense of dressing up, but just being ourselves to laugh and have fun playing a funny game with a pink fuzzy die. I laughed until I cried.

I highly recommended this game for a great night full of laughter, screaming, concentration, counting, points, travels, and BUNCOS!!! Especially since Bunco is “My Midlife” Game of Choice!

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Is the New Year Always the Starting Point?

You would think by “My Midlife” I would be on top of the new year with many tasks to help guide me into a new phase of life. But the new year offers, not only more aspirations and dreams to afford and achieve, but responsibilities in closing the previous year. It’s been a slow transition this time around.

But I was able to pay bills, apply for jobs and new projects, reinstate policies and work membership groups and make appointments for a better transition. I mentally made checklists of everything I want to change for myself – go to the gym more, eat better, life balance, etc. You get the picture.

But do we really have to wait for a new year to make and plan new goals? For me, some of these changes developed in the process of a health scare back in November. Nothing like being thrown into the lions’ den to get your act together. As a result, I’m eating a heart healthy, low-sodium diet. The gym and dancing will come soon enough. And it will all bring my life into balance.

As I’ve been on programs before and previously lost 42 pounds, I know that it works. This time I will change the process. Try new things and give it my all. This time, reality is, it’s not just to look good but to live a longer and healthier life for what’s to come.

Do you have any great tips, links, books or other sources?

When reaching goals in the past, I’ve learned to write out and number lists with those most important at the top. I’ve also seen the encouragement of vision boards. And more encouragement and process happens amongst groups and positive conversations.

But with going forth in making changes, especially at the end of one year and the start of new one, comes reflection. To be honest, my eyes were really opened in November. After the fear subsided, I realized that I’ve been put on this earth, like everyone, for a reason. God has a purpose for all of us. We are to use our talents and gifts for others to see Him. With that said, I write this first blog post encouraging you in the 2017 journey. Make it a great year.

I’d love to hear from you on encouraging words of transitions and dreams you’re achieving in 2017. Blessings to you in your journey.

If you like this blog post,  please subscribe at the bottom of any of these pages to automatically be reminded when new posts are added weekly. And thanks for stopping by and reading.

If you like this blog post,  please subscribe at the bottom of any of these pages to automatically be reminded when new posts are added weekly. And thanks for stopping by and reading.

By “My Midlife,” I’ve been through treacherous roads, both physically and metaphorically. I’m not sure which ones are worse. But both have unknown destinations or reasons for their challenges. These last couple of weeks have been just those – treacherous roads.

With Hurricane Matthew looking like a twin brother of Hurricane Andrew, I thought it best for Mom to evacuate. Since inheriting the beach house, this was the first major storm to hit our little coast of Florida, specifically Melbourne Beach.

“I can evacuate to Orlando,” Mom said. “I want to return to see and pick up the damages.”

“But it’s like an Andrew. And he looks like he’s taking over the state,” I freaked. “And anyway, you can kind of plan for a hurricane, but not the tornadoes that they bring.” With that, she packed the house and came to North Carolina.

Now it wasn’t an easy task for her to just pack and go. Not only did she have to pack her clothes, medicine and make-up. But she also had to pack up her two dogs and their food and toys. And with a hurricane coming, she then had to pack the fridge and freezer in prevention of power loss.

Once she arrived in North Carolina, she rested for a day and then we had to prepare my North Carolina home for the storm. With three levels and porches or decks on two, we had to pull in all of the furniture and planting pots inside. I also prepared my office, in the bottom floor, for tornado evacuations. We brought my dog’s crate and my bird down to the bottom floor. I also had a mattress. But seeing as Mom’s two dogs and mine did not get along, she decided to go to bed in the bedroom on the third floor.

We slept so long that when we awoke we couldn’t find the storm on any of the news sources on our phones. By then my satellite dish was out. I texted friends. We seemed to have slept through most of the storm – some wind but mostly constant rain. Some friends lost power, some lights flickered and many trees fell around the area, closing familiar roads. But we were okay. We had not lost power as the lines in my neighborhood are underground. And with some recent landscape improvements, in our neighborhood, there was not much flooding. We were some of the blessed ones.

Then the aftermath pulled at our hearts and minds. We saw pictures of Florida under water. But no one was aloud on the island. Mom and I fretted, remembering the paintings Dad had hanging in our Florida home. “Mom, did you think to bring…” the list continued of all of the items left in the house. I knew that they were just things, but they were some of the last things of my Dad’s. They were things that his hands had created and could not be replaced. But erasing them from memory, I was glad that mom and the pups made it here safely.

A day or so later we drove around and got a bite to eat. It was nice to be out of the house, yet Mom’s energy was not fully recovered. And when we returned home, she constantly reached for the couch or bed. With a fever blister, we thought it was just the stress of shutting down the Florida home, the rushed road trip and helping to hunker down the North Carolina home. I let her sleep.

On the third evening, she asked to go to the ER. She saw the doctors and they asked her to stay. Now by “My Midlife,” I can be sick all day long and it’s okay because Mom’s there to comfort me, even if just by a phone call, text or email. But when Mom’s sick, trauma sets in and another ride on a treacherous road.

So I got home from the hospital at midnight and tended to all the pups. Sophie, still crated at 57 lbs. and a year old, as of November 2, she stayed crated. Mom’s two shih Tzus ran on the second floor free. With not knowing how they would react without their mom and knowing one was a biter, I let him (Chowder) sleep on the love seat. Claudia and I slept on the couch.

Morning came and now the true testament would take place. With the two little guys still asleep, I took Sophie for a walk. Upon our return, all the house was awake and the pups were ready to go. What to do? I did the best thing any instant mom of three would do. I placed Sophie in the backseat of my car with the windows cracked. It was still early morning and cool. Then I walked Chowder and Claudia, not far but just enough. I then placed them into the backseat of my mom’s SUV where their travel crate was. Once I crated Sophie, I brought the other two back upstairs and my day was accomplished.

Two days after Mom’s hospital release, we had a brilliant idea. With Mom feeling somewhat better and my bird and dog with their sitter, why not leave Sunday afternoon. We could bypass some of the work traffic on Monday and get passed the hardest hit areas. So that’s what we did. But the drive was more than we expected.

Tune in next week to find out just what happened on our drive to Florida and beyond.

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By “My Midlife” you would hope to know all of the answers on how to succeed. Unfortunately, I don’t. But I do enjoy learning from others and am inspired to learn how to succeed through all mediums.

I say all of this as I did just that last year in July. I left my full-time job that I held for six years as a production assistant into a freelance writer and event planner/coordinator. It’s been a busy year writing numerous articles for Circa Magazine, assisting with a wedding reception and two Baptist State Convention Annual Meetings (about to complete my eighth year running this project.).

With this career change, I added to my education through community college courses: Write It Like A Journalist and Special Event Planning. Write It Like A Journalist re-awoke my love of writing allowing me to refocus this skill in this day and age. I found work in magazines, the web and blogging. My passed job taught me WordPress skills and enabled me to find a new venue. Check out my website: http://moniquemrogers.com/.

The Special Event Planning course encouraged the sharpening of the skills I already had and gained more knowledge of the industry. Within that course, I assisted a friend with her wedding reception.

In addition to the community college courses, I joined groups in the industry such as the American Marketing Association (AMA) and Women In Network (WIN) North Ridge Chapter. I also participated more with the Triangle Association of Freelancers (TAF). I’ve not only received a lot of great knowledge from these groups, but also encouragement and motivation.

I also attended at least one function with Alice Osborn with her one day Memoir course and a meeting with Business and Professional Women/Raleigh (BPW/Triangle) where I gained even more stills and met some wonderful working women.

With all of these professional changes, personal life doesn’t stop. I had the opportunity to volunteer and train with the Baptist on Mission, also known as Baptist Men. I learned how to cook for about 350 people on a team with American Red Cross standards within the Disaster Relief Training in Mass Feeding.

I also joined Mended Hearts where I volunteer, visiting cardiac patients weekly. I’ve also had the opportunity to use my writing skills by writing an article about their annual meeting this past year which was published in the WakeMed Hospital’s newspaper. This year I’ve been nominated to hold the     office for the coming year.

Though I know just leaving jobs, people and things behind is scary, not knowing where you’ll land, it is well worth it. This year I’m preparing for a more permanent job. But with the knowledge I’ve gained, I can continue my writing and event planning/coordinating on the side and see where I go.